I’d like to help people remove the blocks and barriers to being their best selves possible.
We have all experienced some trauma, tragedy or challenge in life. At Becoming Exceptional, my goal is to provide the tools and support individually needed to help people reach their own goals and achieve the life outcomes they desire.
What Gets in the Way?
For many of us, we’ve experienced hard things in our lives. Perhaps we went through childhood trauma, lost a loved one, suffered abuse, or just didn’t have good role models to teach us the basic healthy ways of interacting.
Our early childhood experiences are what develop our core beliefs. Watch the movie, Inside Out, as it’s fairly accurate about how these things impact our choices, feelings, and responses to life. Without our core beliefs and basic personality we really do have nothing. When those core beliefs are negative or unhealthy, they can skew how we see the world, how we respond to others, and what we believe about ourselves.
If we don’t change these core beliefs it’s extremely difficult to change our perspective, reactions, or outcomes to something other than what they’ve been so far.
How Do I Change My Outcomes?
When we change our belief systems, or core beliefs, we can actually change the outcome of situations, relationships, and life in general. There are many ways to accomplish this. Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT) offers methods to address core beliefs. Quantum Healing techniques can address and change core beliefs. Working through the issues and layers on top of those beliefs can allow us to get down deep to where it all started and decide what you want that belief to be which will get us headed in the direction we really want.
The process, not the method, is really what matters and that is as unique as your thumbprint and your perspective on life. It’s all up to you how you choose to go about this change.
Why Do I Need Help to Change?
We are not meant to live in a silo. We need other human beings and are created from birth (at least) with the desire and tools to connect with other human beings. Sometimes those connections aren’t made effectively. Sometimes we’re too close to the problem to see a way out. Possibly we don’t know that there’s any other way to do things or to be because we’ve never experienced the possibilities or had them modeled for us.
When we work with someone who has the tools, knowledge, or experience to lead us, lift us up, and guide us through the process it helps us maneuver these changes more smoothly.
I once had a student I worked with that had grown up in a drug home. When the adults had drug parties, the kids would go hide in their room until it was safe to come out. One summer this young adult disappeared for a month. No one could find him or contact him. We were quite worried. When he finally reappeared we discovered that he’d gotten stressed about life and had, literally, disappeared into his room. I suggested that this response worked for him as a kid, but he now had to decide if that response would work as an adult. If he disappeared from a job or a relationship for a month it’s not likely either would be there when he showed up in his life again. His response? “I’d never thought of that before.”
We can’t change what we don’t know isn’t working. It’s important to become aware of what we’re doing, why we’re doing it, and what we can do instead. Often this is difficult to do without the perspective of someone else. This gaining of new perspectives, of opening up the possibilities, and of moving into a new healthy life is what I hope to accomplish in my work with people.